Quest For Cosmic Connection
Transfer from older blog wordpress.com/jerredandnatalie
Summer is HERE!
The moment we’ve all been waiting for. After the longest, greyest, rainiest winter of all time I know I certainly questioned my ability to tolerate another winter here. I used to pride myself in my ability to maintain a positive outlook even if I hadn’t seen the sun in weeks. But after my third and most challenging winter in the PNW I am more than humbled by my seasonal depression and forced to admit that my moods are often too easily influenced by the color of the sky. Even with the countless days of gloomy grey, Seattle is still a paradise and heaven in my eyes. The Puget Sound and easy access to the ocean are crucial for my sanity, alongside the mountains, rainforests and evergreens that surround us. But something else here has really began to click for me.
I have a long history of fighting depression/’mood disorders’/’mental illness’ (whole other blog post) and just down right feeling isolated, alienated, foreign, as if I don’t belong. I believe that is one of the most common forms of suffering among our planet and that all suffering stems from one thing – the illusion of separateness – and that the real cure for depression lies in the realization that we are all connected, we are all one. (certainly more blogging on this to come!) I could only barely see through the veils enough to know that I was suffering and that I craved connection. It wasn’t until after years of battling my shadows that I made a connection between the two. My broken heart was because I felt so disconnected. Society today is so distant. Our relationships are fostered through a tiny screen and when we’re spending time with those we love we’re often distracted by that same tiny screen.
I traveled from state to state longing to be surrounded by not only like-minded individuals, but a close community who I felt truly understood the depths of my soul. I personally don’t excel at small talk or generating casual conversation. I want to skip past all that and speak straight to your soul. I openly welcome everyone right into my heart and I don’t really have additional authentic ways of communicating. Yes, I can carry on with anyone about anything. But beyond all that, what I truly value and desire is to bring out what lies underneath the surface.
After years of moving and searching and finding the pockets of people who are similar in different areas, I still felt lost. Even Seattle has been a rollercoaster of ecstasy and heartbreak. I have a tendency to see people in their most pure state, meaning I can see people’s souls. This has been both a blessing and a curse. I see the good in everyone and I often don’t realize that although this light exists within all of us, some people haven’t quite discovered it yet. Coming from someone who is yearning for that deep connection with others, when I happen to recognize what I think is another awakened individual I have been wrong about my assumptions and occasionally left feeling confused and even more alone.
I try my best to immerse myself in the environments that hold promise of open-hearted spirits. Yoga, meditation, musicians, healers, artists, reiki practitioners, health gurus, etc have all been very rewarding in finding beautiful relationships. But I still wanted more. I still felt isolated in my empathy for the planet and her tribe.
Fortunately for me, the tides are shifting and the current is becoming stronger. It was also a matter of my own mindset adjusting and opening to the fact that I’m not alone. Years of searching had me feeling hopeless and I needed to change my own attitude. The signs of an enlightened community are more prominent than ever and my eyes are more focused and more open to receive these messages! Seattle specifically is known for it’s progressiveness. I knew this from the beginning but as the rest of the world seems more asleep, our city has observed the need to become more outspoken and blunt about where we stand! The signs are everywhere and I realize I’m truly in the perfect place. The open minded, open hearted, soul expanding are abundant and everywhere you look in this city! Yoga studios are popping up everywhere, more and more people are finding methods of natural healing and practicing meditation, communities are forming and people are shifting towards the light. The change is happening and the change is now. We are on the crest of this massive love tsunami preparing to sweep the planet and raise the collective vibration of our people. What a fucking incredible time to be alive. What an incredible journey to be a part of.
I’ll still probably try to fast forward the bull shit small talk about news and the weather and try to get all meta on you upon our initial name exchange (I prefer hugs) but instead of looking for and seeking out my tribe, I recognize that it’s all of us, everyone. Everywhere I am, I am surrounded by my people. Gods and Goddesses dressed up in suits of skin and bone. Every time I have the privilege of sharing yoga, every time I have an interaction with another being, every time I am stuck in traffic, I am surrounded by the light tribe. I have never been lost, I only had to see the light within myself first in order to see it in others.
Thank you, all of you for your work in this world. It is appreciated, it is making a difference.
June 04 2017